One of the huge realizations of my 20s was how much I was holding myself back with my own thinking. It’s crazy to me now, but I used to tell myself that I never got what I wanted: the boys I had crushes on in high school never liked me back, the jobs I applied for never picked me, etc. I found so much evidence for that story that I never got what I really wanted.
Then one of my mentors explained to me that we find evidence to support all of our beliefs, not the other way around. It’s the same principle as suddenly seeing a lot of the same kind of car you are thinking of buying, getting engaged and seeing brides everywhere, etc.
If I started to think that I actually had great things happen to me and had an amazing life, I would start to see evidence of that. And tbh, it worked.
You have probably heard about manifesting your desires, the power of positive thinking, and the idea that what you think about grows. This all sounds kind of magical, but instead of the universe being your personal wish granting factory, these concepts are actually more like a way to hack your own brain so that you stop engaging in self defeating thoughts.
Give this is a try: think about one of the stories you tell yourself about yourself that limits you, whether it is “I never get what I really want,” “I have no friends,” “my dating life is a disaster,” or something totally different. Think about the opposite. Can you find evidence to support the opposite? Have you gotten something you worked really hard for, are there people who constantly ask you to get together and you never reciprocate, or is there evidence of great partners in your past? You can probably find some evidence to support the opposite.
If you want to take a really deep dive into this topic, check out The Roadmap. I walk you through how to dismantle all of your thoughts that hold you back and how to get clarity and inspiration to move forward in life in the direction you want (and if you don’t even know what you want, we work on that too).
I’ll leave you with one thought: time flies. Our lives fly by. Take responsibility for your life, your happiness, and what you are creating now.